"Honour your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you." Ex20:12

Supposed to be posted on 21st July 2008

For the last few days, this verse " Honor your father and your mother" keeps coming back to me.. no matter day or night; it just keep repeatedly appeared to me. But I just don't know why so I just ignore it as I'm have put my focus to make sure I have the right decision using on my own understanding and strength.

To be frank, deep down in my heart I'm not willing to let go but I knew it well that I can no longer be selfish anymore, I need to learn to care for others especially my parents. All these while, my focus is what I want and how my parents can provide to me; never ever in my thoughts that I ever think of what can I do to my parents. Their unconditional love has pampered and spoilt me!!! Since young till now, they are always my best supporters in the earth !! Even though I have make thousands of mistakes and failed them; they comforted me and said.. "It's ok! WE love U"!! Do I deserve this? "YES" was the answered in my mind all this while because for me, this is the 'standard criteria' of parents! How wrong am I!!! And what a shame to me!!!

After much conflict within myself, finally I have decided to make the decision to stay back in Malaysia to further my studies. As I informed my parents on my final decision, they were just like the world most happiest person and all their burden is release!!! To be frank, I feel relief after I made the decision and I just dont understand why that I still believe my dream will not just ended here... I will make it a reality ONE DAY and I'm confidence God will watch over me, if this is HIS WILL and not mine!

As I have done with my decision making, I have shared it with one of my best friends in overseas, what I told her was only " Honor your parents" and she reminded me of the next God's promise when I honored my parents; which is "...so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you" In Ex 20:12.

What I would said is as long as I honor God; His promised never fails! I Love YOU, Jesus!