Monday, June 8, 2009

Gonna Miss you dearly............

Suppose now... it's the time for me to do my revision and get myself prepared for my coming exam... but.. the feeling within me... aiks.. has kept reminding me..that I'm gonna miss you dearly....

Guess... this is not only referring to you only... but all of you...
I will never forget the time we fight the battle together...
The time we hold each others up, the time we hugged each others, encourage each others, fooling and 'flirting' around... The time we shared our heart and our tears....our joy and sadness together...

You.. dear... is the one that saw me crying and knowing that I dont need any WORDS.. but just a listening ears... and be by my side. You... dear is always there to cheer up my days whenever I'm blue and remind me to smile always as my 'cool' face scared guys away...

Since now you are leaving... ... I started to feel 'empty' inside and missing you alot.....
Lives goes on.. things changed... I prayed that our friendship will always remains.
No matter how our future will be.. you are still my BEST buddies...
All the wonderful memories that we had .. I have locked it deep down in my heart and seal it.
No one can take it away........

I pray that God will watch over you and be with you, my dear. Luv you always....

Thursday, May 7, 2009

My First Time ......... Attend BM Revival Meeting

As a Christian for so... long.. Shame to myself that I haven't really attended any BM language revival meeting before ... even though I went to BM Service in my church few years back but.. never to the Revival Meeting which is among the 'most happening' event in town!!!

Thank God that my colleague who is so passionate with BM speaking people want me to bring him there... so no choice but have to go and let go of my badminton session lor..

But... God is good! He wont let me go home with empty hand but I'm so blessed that the speaker Daud Tony is so humorous and learning alot from his testimony... Thanks God.. that I understand 90% of what he said as he speak Bahasa Indonesia.. (thanks to my job as I need to speak Bahasa Indonesia too... with my Indonesia colleague)..

Besides from the great testimony sharing, I felt that there's an urgency to reach out and I dont know why but during 'altar call' time.. when I see the crowd moving towards the altar... once again... I sense God's grace and mercy upon all of us... I see the need to pray for the ppl ...... but I just stand at the same place as I know not what to do... as there's alot of ppl and there's leaders too..... (shame on me... again for not knowing that I'm host... but I cant pray in BM/BI!) Aiks....
But... everything is in control as we have great usher and BM leaders...... thanks to them.

After the meeting, while I'm waiting for my friend getting his bibles and CD's of the speaker.
Guess what I get during the 'waiting moment' ........ the warm from the bros and sis from BM speaking congregation ... we greet each others and exchanged peace!!! I haven't experience this for years wat I mean is without ppl on the stage asking u to do it.. but naturally greet you because they want to greet u!!!! ( I know lar... shame on me again!) But tonite.. is really an eye opening... as I come as I need to bring my friend... but what I gained is much more than I expected and this once again reminds me......... GOD is GREAT!!

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Living in FEAR!!!

In lives, you meet with all kinds of people..
There's one that jokes with you, care, love, kind, just be there for you whenever you need them...
There's one that you hope that they never come across your lives and you don't wish they are there... (sorry for 'judging' or discriminating') but I'm just saying what I felt now...

This week.. has been a 'dramatic' week as...
My colleague's handbag was snatched by motorbiker just right in front my office! And when I heard the screaming shout and ran out... everything has just 'over'... But thank God, she was 'unhurt' as there's no 'parang' or 'bleeding' incident.... and her loss was only all the '$$' in the bags...
Thru this incident, it has reminded us once again to be extra careful and cautious all the time.. And it has indirectly telling all of us that we are actually LIVING IN FEAR!!!
What has happen to our society!!!! Why there's no helping hands at all and people just stand there and SEE SEE LOOK LOOK!!!

Thursday, April 2, 2009

It's April.... Q1 09 was a history...

People tends to do their yearly resolutions and I believe for me... Quarterly evaluation will be more meaningful to me as it helps to remind myself to treasure the time that I have in the world to do more things for the LORD, my family and people around me.

But what have I done throughout the past 3mths? Erm... not to mention on the Chinese New Year celebration that I had in FEB and visiting new place such Medan for the first time in January and tomorrow I will visiting Surabaya.. I have been 'extremely' addicted to do 'Global Trotting' and my current record is out of Malaysia every 3 mth since 2008! There's alot of plan in my mind.. plans will remain as plans and dream will only dream if there's NO ACTION! Where is my next destination? SECRET... :-p

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

超无聊!!超闷!!

我要发霉了!我快顶不顺了!
生活无聊,工作无反向,感情无靠岸,唉。。。。 好灰阿!!
我已不耐烦了。。我好想离开这地方。。。
我可以远走高飞吗?不顾一切的奔向我要的生活和我要走的路吗?

勇气啊!勇气啊!
你在哪里??

Monday, March 9, 2009

我要睡觉!!!

惨了!我太紧张了。。。 因为我要见南美来的客人与商场上的朋友们。。。
我想是因为什么准备也没做所以难以入眠。。。 已经是一点了。。。我还很精神很有活力。。惨了要变成熊猫眼见人了。。。 我要怎样呢!!

上帝啊!!您一定要看护我啊!让我有个足够的睡眠来应付今天!!

Friday, March 6, 2009

找回自己。。。

好多时后, 大家都认为一个三十快到的女生是熟女。
视她为见过世面,懂得大体,和往往都会在适当的时候保护自己不让自己受到任何的伤害女生。
烦恼与压力已经是生活上的一部分, 狂风暴雨早就视为家常便饭了。

其实我也在反反复复的问着我自己到底我有这些条件吗?
或者我应该说我有被真实的社会生活给淹没了我自己和我真正要的生活方式吗?
我想我早已有数。。。在很早很早以前。。我已迷失了方向迷失了我自己。。。

小时候, 我真的以为城市生活是多姿多彩,OL是时尚女性的职业。。。
长大后才知道这些全是幻想是假象,成人的生活是有酸甜苦辣的,好景不会常在, 但雨后我都会抱着看到彩虹的希望。希望归希望,路还是要走。。。要往那个方向呢?相信只有我自己知了!

流浪和观看创造者所创造的世界是我一直以来的坚持, 但迈向熟女的路程。。 我想已渐渐的把它抛到脑后了。常听说当年级越大所可以做的事就会越来越少。。 活力以及冲击也会随着时间慢慢的消失。我好想找回我自己。。。找回那不怕天有多高,地有多厚,海有多深的自己。

我想。。。 要照会自己最好的方法就是行动吧!!!

要加油哦!!

Saturday, February 28, 2009

CREDIT!!!

It has been a long time that I didn't blogged....
Not that I have forgotten my blog.. but I don't know what to write...
Not to say that I have a very dull life.. .. erm.. maybe there's just too much and alot of stuff..Which I need to structure it out on the happenings and.. by that time.. the inspiration and mood.... hehhee... fly..


As I woke up early this morning which is an unusual things because it's weekend!
Guess it must be the alarm clock in my body.. what to do .. I'm an office lady... working 9-6..

Then suddenly I remember that I havent check my MBA last assignment result..
To be very frank.. I dont put high hope and I just pray that I will pass because the first assignment I just get a mere pass result and the second assignment... I completed it by taking EMERGENCY LEAVE!!! As usual.. I go to USQ connect.. and logon ... then it shows CREDIT!!! I dont trust my eye initially as I dont see my name on the page and I thought there must be some 'virus' or system error or an example of exams transcript result....
So I double checked it again thru the conventional way and read the comment from the lecturer for the second assignment!

Guess what!! She said.. " Overall a good assignment. Well done. "
I cant believe my eyes as I complete and submit the assignment 20mins before the due time of assignment submission! And this is without checking the spelling error, grammar or etc... as I have no time di....


Friends... As you read this... I'm not sharing how GENG I'm .. But How Great God is and How He has blessed me!
But please DO NOT use me as testimony that by last minutes also God will bless. Last minutes and burning midnite oil is NO FUN!! I have several sleepless nite and very tension weeks during that time! Taking emergency leave to complete the assignment is a NO NO NO thing! (I have no choice di....) At here, what I would like to say is that I wanna praise the LORD for his greatness and blessing to me all this while. With the result that I have, it really does encourage me to press on and no matter how bad it the economy, working places, career, personal life, at least I know I have do the right thing .. which is to gain as much knowledge as I can while I can!

Let all the PRAISE and GLORY be UNTO our LORD JESUS!! AMEN!

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Under Super Stress.....

I'm just completing the 7th day of 2009 and it was like going thru a brand new year in a brand new way... And with or without anticipation, i t will absolutely a year with 'wonders' and 'challenge'!

At this point of time, finally I started to scene the 'seriousness' or the real impact of 'reality'...
I'm wonder whether I'm too positive or I'm just trying to be not that 'skeptic' abt reports in the newspapers or analysis made by experts ... and keep my thinking and emotion in positive mode all the time... I know that the situation is bad or we are at crisis now.. but.. I still tends to calm and ensure things is done at a proper ways.. but I always hear ppl screaming that since we are in 'crisis' things need to be done in a split second and MUST BE DONE and TARGET need to be ACHIEVED!

After much reflection of my career lives, to be frank; I'm ashamed of myself! Not to boast abt what the success that I have achieved for the company but in personal growth wise; I just felt that I'm not growing and started to move downwards instead of forward! Guess... I have given myself too much excuse that I have done my best and this is my best.. I HAVE STOPPED GROWING! and this is the DANGER!!!

Today, one of my colleague approaches me for advice and guidance as I'm one of the seniors or old folk that still survived... I've doing my very best to encourage and motivate her to be positive as I want her to 'recharge' once again so that she can continue fighting the war... But when I'm in the midst of persuading and advice her... internally I felt so guilty that I have even more negative emotion or emotionless towards what has happened around... I felt like a hypocrite! Oh God.. help me! As a senior... I have to encourage and pull ppl up.. I cant let down be as down as me.. otherwise the ship will sink... But.. I need fresh air...

It's great to have some talks with old friends and it helps to refresh myself... but sometimes the conversation will go head wire until every single 'nonsense' makes sense.. hahaha...
And this helps to bright the day!

As I reflected back when I'm still teenage, yes.. to be frank; I always hope to be grown up so that I have all the freedom I want to do whatever things that I like. My parents will have NO say to stop me from buying anything since I'm no longer using their money and no exams to worry about. But as I looked at myself. I have put one leg into career, one leg into studies and one hands to God's work and one hands for my own. Especially now... when the economy is so bad; not to mention what I read from news... but now I'm experiencing it... It is quite unbearable and tough for me to handle.. and the stress level is increasing every single days and I dont know how long I can stand it...!!

One things which I'm most disappointed was friend's betrayal which has further demotivated me! However, I truly understand that it's very common for everyone to take care of their rice bowl and own interested when crisis arises! Betrayal is hurt but good too so that I know that never ever put ur trust on people but ON GOD! Even I have been working for more than 5 yrs; however my 'exposure' to the 'world' is still very limited as everyone around me seems to be angels! I'm always the BLESSED one and I've counted myself BLESSED too. So I truly believed I have to out to the 'real world' to learn more lesson and protect myself more; ignorant and naive will kill me one day! So.. WAKE UP TRACY!

Sunday, January 4, 2009

Week 1 of 2009..........

I'm going thru my Week 1 2009 with ......... wedding ceremony and wedding dinner.... !!
It's a busy weekend for me as I need to attend two friends wedding... one in PJ and one in Seremban (Sat and Sunday) and there.. goes my weekend....!!

The wedding dinner in Seremban on Saturday was a great one! I only knew the bridegroom who was my ex-Nilai College course mate and Suki who purposely took leave to attend the wedding. During the dinner time, the first 2 hrs was complete awkward and silent as we knew non of the ppl that sit on the same table with us. However, when another 3 complete stranger that rushed from Singapore to the wedding dinner appeared... The whole atmosphere changed! Two of them were from Taiwan and they came to tour around Malaysia and Singapore. The couple opened a shop to 'fool' ppl that located at Si Meng Ting, Taiwan. They gave me their name cards and to be frank, I planned to visit them whenever I went to Taiwan. On top of the great parts were they bring along their 'tools', 'gadgets' and 'stuffs' with them! And they tricked the ppl at our table.. we have a great time chit chat and fooling ppl around the table... It's great to get to know new friends...

I had another wedding dinner just now, it was more towards 'french' + Chinese cause got 'yam seng' part... Hahaha.. it's a buffet style and free seating function.. Very relax and comfortable environment... Aiks.. it seems that I have 'overdress'.. which seldom happened to me.. (hahahaha.. or never happen as I always 'under dress'..)

Year 2009 as I have already predicted in Dec 2008; will be the most blessed year as it's a year where all my friends will send me invitation cards to attend their wedding.. Up to today date, the confirmed wedding dinner with date that I received is 3 and there's 2 couples that pending to confirmed the final date and another 2 more couple, I have predicted that they will send me the cards anytime without any early notice.... Guys... if you are not in the list here... please do let me know in advance as I really have 'limited' time nowadays... ... (ahem.. don't think too much lar.... me .. student now.. have to rush assignment ar.... )